Yesterday I read a post on LinkedIn which talked about quitting. All my life at least all my adult life I was made to feel that quitting was for losers. In fact I even subscribed to the poem Don’t Quit.
Flogging the Dead Horse
So the first line of the post by Anna Marie Miller who is a Culture and recognition consultant, read “You’re looking at a quitter”. Talk about a tagline.
I realized that I was doing that. Not quitting some things in my life was like flogging a dead horse.
What do I mean by that?
After almost 29 years of living in the United States of America, I still resort to the immigrant mentality sometimes.
This mentality is to take the crumbs from off the master’s table. Despite my education and my experience working on some very prestigious projects I still settle for less when it comes to work when it comes to how people treat me.
But when it does not happen year after year decade after decade it’s time to stop.
It is time to say, enough is enough. I will not settle for less. I will not take what you are giving me. I will forge my own path even if I have to work twice as hard.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I am very grateful for the help and connections I have made over the years. I recognize those that come from genuineness.
I am talking about a very different kind of help. One that seeks to control by helping.
One that seeks to condescend by suggesting.
Unfortunately, we do not see it until we are too far in sometimes.
Live unapologetically
How does one live unapologetically and yet sensitively towards the needs of others?
It is important to stick to one’s value system and believe system and yet create healthy boundaries of respect.
To politely decline the controlling type of help.
Gentleness towards others and meekness without being reactionary when they oppose you is something I still have yet to learn.
It’s an art.
But it is not too late to practice and develop it.
And when we have children that look at us as a role models it is important to create an atmosphere of love and respect with people in our lives and when that does not happen it is important to be silent and withdrawal away from the triggers.
We are in a constant process of reinventing and redefining ourselves. Our greatest competitors are ourselves. How do we reach a full potential and really live quality lives.
I would love to know your thoughts. Comments are welcome!
